Snark Satire

the Major General

Every once in a while I read something that reminds me so much of something in music, literature, or the movies that I just have to do a rewrite.

On TPM, crow73 wrote of Sarah Palin:

I agree she is the model of a modern day GOP general.
Enrich the rich spit on the poor and subjugate anyone not white Christian ignorant or male. She will never win a national election the GOP hates women.

This was a clear reference to The Pirates of Penzance.

The song is replete with historical and cultural references, satirically demonstrating the Major-General’s impressive and well-rounded education that seems to come at the complete expense of any useful military knowledge.
Major-General’s Song

So I gave in to temptation and rewrote the beginning of the Major-General’s Song to apply to Palin, or many other conservative leaders for that matter:

I am the very model of a modern Neo-Conservative,
I’ve information fanciful, misleading, and pejorative,
I know the Lords of Wall Street, and I quote the fights historical
From Medicare to Climate Change, in order categorical;
I’m very well acquainted, too, with matters hyperpolitical,
I understand agendas, both the divisive and fanatical,
About economic theorem I’m teeming with a lot o’ news,
With many cheerful facts about the size of unemployment queues…

• The GOP is the mystery tour bus on the road to the third world.

TPM wrote a piece about Mike Huckabee’s “Learn Our History” materials. And I responded:

“So like a conservative to charge money for their own propaganda. Not to mention the pathetic artwork and lousy script.I am sure that the parallels between republicans and the description of Hitler in the last clip are completely lost on Huckabee.”

Conservatives have been ordained by God to rule America.
The country has been poisoned by liberals.
The republican party is the remedy for all of this.

…

A sneak attack on Benton Harbor…
Extra, extra, GOP declares war on unions and gays…and women, and workers, and children, and seniors, and the poor, and the unemployed, and the environment, … progressive religions …
Even the Vatican pitched in.
We’ll show those liberals and atheists the power of prejudice!
What we see and hear doesn’t always match the party line. But we believe, and that’s good enough for us.

Huckabee’s definition of “unbiased” seems to be his own far-right/theocratic world-view, untainted by any fact he does not care to recognize or challenges his perspective.

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